Quotes and jokes!

[Brinty]

The youngest member of a football team is about to get married. In a private meeting with the team coach, he admits that he is still a virgin and has no idea how to go about consummating his upcoming marriage. The coach, a fatherly figure to the team members says, "well son, I can only plant a suggestion in your mind. Nature has a way of taking control in moments like this, but to get you started, when you get into bed on your wedding night, place your hand on your wife's stomach and gently rubbing it say, 'I love you darling.' You'll find that nature will carry on from there."

So, on their wedding night the young couple climb into bed. The new husband places his hand on his wife's stomach and in a voice trembling with a mixture of apprehension and desire, manages to say in a falsetto, "I love you darling."

His wife snuggles up to him and says, "lower darling, lower." So, taking a big breath and clearing his throat, he says in a deep bass voice, "I love you darling."