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-   -   Notes from an exsperiencer (http://projectavalon.net/forum/showthread.php?t=5298)

David 10-14-2008 11:32 PM

Notes from an exsperiencer
 
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Theresa 10-15-2008 01:17 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Your sentiment reminds me of Whitley Strieber's memoirs, if I recall.

Also, I have heard that we DO have choice about being abducted. You remember being asked. That's interesting.

There must be many ET's and interdimensional beings that interact with us. I only talk to them psychically. They wont' even make contact with me physically, at least not yet. I don't feel that they are "grey's". I feel that they are more Galactic Federation-Pleidians, Arcturians...maybe others. They feel at least 5th dimension or higher-more "interdimensional". Well, I guess they are all interdimensional, eh?

interesting....

David 10-15-2008 02:13 AM

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David 10-17-2008 06:40 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
What I do know:

The time for our destructive ways are coming to a close. A time of cleansing will begin and when the dust settles, Hybrids and Humans will live side by side.

Metaphor 10-17-2008 09:17 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
The only feeling I get from your writing, wich by the way was intriguing to read, is anger. The love you say you feel doesn´t come through to me.
The only ting I felt was like, how can they do that(!). They treat him like we treat cattle ( wich is btw the reason i became vegetarian, I dont want to be treated that way so i do not support that being done to animals also)

I too have dream-memories of some kind of abduction, its like they live in the astral world or something. Most recently I dreamed of them I remember clearly that I refused to let them enter my domain. I remember that I shouted mentally "NO- you are not welcome"

I do want to know how to get these memories out of the back of my mind. Tried hypnosis, but it was like i was not allowed to enter these subjects. My mind went totally blank when I tried to enter these memories during the session.

Any suggestions how to collect the memory of a possible abduction (without forcing through or making it all up subconsciously?

David 10-18-2008 12:11 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
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JSErwine 10-23-2008 08:06 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Ok, I need some help and this thread looks to be a good place to ask for it.

Close to 30 years ago I experienced what I believe to be contact with 2 of the short greys and some type of....what I think was some sort of machine/robot.

I for years put this off as some unforgetable, extremely real dream. Though over the past decade, I have come to face the fact that this was probably not a dream. I would also like to state that this event has been a heavy burdine to bear, and has also lead to the use of substances to supress the event. (for christ sake I was only 9 or 10 years old and it scared the holy bejesus out of me)

So I guess I'm looking for some kind of guidance or confirmation from others that have had the same experiences that can confirm or denie that what I experienced was real.

David 10-23-2008 12:33 PM

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Zelong 10-23-2008 01:03 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 54383)
What I do know:

The time for our destructive ways are coming to a close. A time of cleansing will begin and when the dust settles, Hybrids and Humans will live side by side.

Hi Dave very interesting post,I realise how hard it is to recall and write down these experiences,I'm sure you have more but maybe to evasive to recall at the present.

You statement here is Important I feel ,in a lot of Abduction cases there's always a statement such as yours,where the Blame is put directly at the People of Earth and not Our government's ,Oil company's,Companys that dig Quarrys/Craters in the ground,Companys that rape our forests etc....

There's noway I will live 'side by side" with these so called Hybrids,this can not be good at all.

Some may Hum, myself I will cut them down before they cut us down after all I am just a mere Male Earthling. :lightsabre:

Good Luck with it,your best help is your Wife mate,you live together and she knows you more than most.

Regards
Zelong.

David 10-23-2008 01:25 PM

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JSErwine 10-23-2008 04:32 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 59491)
Hi JSErwine, when I look back on it and being at such a young age when it all started, makes me mad because at this age, you really are easy prey. All I wanted, was do as I was asked, kept telling myself it was just a dream and hoped I would wake up in bed after it was over.

Can you describe in detail what happened?

Here go's,

I was sleeping and something woke me, i'm thinking it must have been the bedroom door being opened that woke me up. Still lying there I turned my head towards the doorway and 2 little greys 4 ft. or so in heigth entered.

Between the two little guys was something, all I can think is that it was a machine or robot because of it's obvious geometric shape and metalic looking material it was constructed from. The object also seemed to levetate and it appeared the two little guys were guiding it along.

Paralizing fear overtook me, I remember I wanted to say something/scream but was impossible to do. All I could do was just look at them, and they almost seemed to look back at me with indecision.

After a few seconds of this my mind go's blank, no memory of attempting to go back to sleep, going into mom and dads room (which would have been the normal reaction after a bad dream), nothing just a complete blank.


I wish there was more for me to describe, but thats it and I'm sure my mind has supressed my memorys from the obvious terror I was experiencing. Perhaps one day I will seek out a hipnotist to help unlock these hidden memorys, but I'm taking this one step at a time. Just talking about this publicaly over the last week or so has been a huge step, prior to these forums I have only talked about it with two other people in my life.

David 10-23-2008 06:44 PM

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JSErwine 10-23-2008 07:21 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 59751)

Your mention of them looking back at you with indecision is a common facial expression I saw as well, however minute of an expression they actually have. Did you have a chance to look behind you? There always seems to be another close to my side to put me back under control when I wake up during an abduction.


No chance at all to look around, just the first turning of my head to look towards what was coming into my bedroom. Then being overtaken by paralizing fear, it was like being frozen solid.

I realy wish there was more I could share, that would mean I had a greater understanding of what this event was. Even if that means it was nothing more than a very elaborate and real dream.

Thanks for your response,

Jeff

David 11-04-2008 08:05 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
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Fredkc 11-06-2008 10:28 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Hi David;
Very interesting stuff.
Quote:

Once I noticed this, the Reptilian comes rushing in to me and aggressively pushes me against the mirror to subdue me with his eyes. He was so fast, he moved like a Gazelle on full sprint. I black out here.
Seems to be a couple of common themes, here. Bear with me a sec.

The first one that comes to mind has to do with the fear involved with being "transported" without permission, subjected to changes, experiments, whatever, all against our will. In fact, it sure seems a fair appraisal that in any of these encounters, theirs is at least 50% of the fear brought to the party. And notice their fear is always served. Yours is to be endured or simply blocked/forgotten poorly.
Quote:

1. (At the beginning of the abductions, age 10?) My eyes were closed and could not open them. I kept trying to sit up but was physically forced back to lay down. I was told mentally what they would be doing to me and the reason why. I don't recall the whole conversation but do remember being asked if it was ok for them to do this. I said yes because their explanation made sense and my best interest/safety was involved. Basically.....I told them it was ok to take me and do what was needed but they did offer me a choice in the matter. The fact that I was given a choice is comforting.
Ya know, I couldn't think of a legal or slightly moral frame of reference where I could imagine anyone calling this implied consent.

Then there's the treatment. For good or ill, it occurs to me that lab rats probably get treated with more compassion when they're being "shuffled off to another state of entropy", a box at a time. And still...

Quote:

This is because I have either been allowed to remember more of these events when they happen and recall more memories or their memory wipe is not working that well anymore. To get straight to the point, they are my family.
You have to just marvel, really. I mean, isn't this the very emotional reaction you'd expect from anyone who was basically set upon like something in a petri dish?

25 years ago, I "woke up" laying face up on a table. The whole room, including occupants were all so brilliantly white I could barely make out detail of an kind. I couldn't move. Didn't want to. I felt somehow "laid open" like it was some odd surgery where they open you up, lay most of your internal organs aside in sterile trays and then go to work on you. And I'm the only "human" in the room.

And a face I can't make out comes down to become the only thing I can see, and I hear, "Relax, go back to sleep. You're being re-wired". I did what any other sane person would do who suddenly finds self in this position (yeah, right). I casually shrugged off the whole scene and went to sleep.

Years later I still don't have a good clue to what that was all about. A bunch of supposes and things, sure. But it's odd, and subtly done, I think, that for 25 years the whole thing has always posed itself as a search for what sort of "blessing" I'd received.

"Gee, thanks for the train wreck." Bitter comfort that such a form of life can operate as effectively as it does, and still behave in such a sloppy manner occasionally, and harbor such fear as it does.

Sorry that it took this 24 hrs to write. It became something I hadn't really intended when I began.

But life also survives upon humor, so I just have to ask...

David, did they put back the eyeglasses? ;)

freekatz 11-06-2008 10:46 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
David, I also had an incredible sense of deja vu when I read a certain part in JIm Spark's book, it really freaked me out. I haven't however, been able to remember anything like the stuff you have, it does make me question whether I had some encounters when I was very young though.

David 11-07-2008 01:52 AM

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Rebel4Life 11-07-2008 02:03 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
red eyes....yep those are reptilians alright probably draconians. There is a way to defeat these bastards don't trust the reptilians that's one thing I have learned from experience...another thing I show no love for these beings at all they need to gtfo of our solar system and away from the human race.

David 12-01-2008 02:51 AM

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addalight 12-02-2008 10:06 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
:mad3:I'm wondering if you to transcend the fear and tell them they have no right to interfere with your free will, if that might be helpful.:mad3:

David 12-02-2008 05:32 PM

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Wormhole 12-02-2008 06:27 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Hello David, just wanted you to know that I have read every word here. I have gone through great lengths to raise my level of vibration in order to stop all negative contacts, and they have stopped. I only have positive contacts now that I feel in complete control of.

Now the Greys I never dealt with physically, mentally though they did ask me permission and I said NO WAY. They left me a gift to prove to me they had been there (I asked them to do this) and went on their way.

I do have contacts once in a while with some reptilians, but I am not afraid and they seem to be cast-aways from their own race. They seem to be working for the good of humanity. I once had a very negative encounter, long ago that frightened me, but those days are long over.

As I said, I enjoy my contacts now, and have many unique and helpful races come to see me. I feel in control of this and can stop it anytime I feel I need to. (So far, at least for the last ten years) The races that are contacting me now seem to be at a higher vibe then when I was a child, it seems my own spiritual evolution is connected to this very closely.

My question is this, if you could change these events would you? Or do you feel that the present way things are have created a unique path to LOVE and UNITY that full-fills you? You are a loving person, have these experiences aided you or would you have them changed if you could?

I am wondering because a lot of what you are saying reminds me of an abuse victim who has been in an abusive situation for so long that he/she is now identifying with the captors. Do you see what I'm saying? I am just exploring here, and hope deeply that you have the most loving experience that you can have on this planet. I say this with LOVE and a deep respect for your past/present and future.

Peace of Mind,
Wormhole

Visvasa144 12-02-2008 07:06 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 89974)
I have been in their program for so long that it no longer matters what I think or I have made a deal that is hidden subconsciously that is long term and cannot be broken.

It does matter what you think. it can be broken. everything that is done can be undone. thats freewill. what i have experienced and may apply to you as well is that in previous lives the Reptilians may have with your consent of your free will or not. have you contractually obligated with a soul piece. they could have tricked you, they could have bribed you, they could have tortured you and then gotten the soul piece under duress that allows then to enter your space.

remember they can timeline track you throughout your reincarnations. im just telling this through my experiences and other very very credible sources. if the Reptilians are messing with you it is not an accident.

you may have latent abilities that they dont want to see manifested.

i feel wormhole raised a good point about abused victims "identifying with the captors".

they dont give a f-ck about you. all that nice stuff is them being manipulating and in the end all they are doing is using your own weaknesses against yourself. if you have a kind sympathetic heart they will know this and use it against you.

they exploit and try to conquer and control.

are you a vegetarian? it is very important.

take care,
elias visvasa

David 12-03-2008 02:36 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
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Wormhole 12-03-2008 02:49 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
We are there for you, my brave friend.

Peace of Mind,
Wormhole

Visvasa144 12-03-2008 08:48 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 90231)
Thank you Wormhole & Visvasa144 for your kind comments and words of wisdom.

our pleasure:original:

Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 90231)
In my early teens, I was an avid hunter and loved every moment of it. The excitement of the kill and the love of nature put me at home and at one with whom we are. Soon after the abductions started, I found it more and more difficult to pull that trigger. The hesitation of pulling that trigger was caused by a gradual increase of empathness?

clairsentience, nice. do you know how rare it is for a male to have this ability. im sure yours needs more developing but the building blocks are their.
clairsentience is an ability i have always had. you can do a lot of good with this ability. more women have this then men but more and more men are getting this ability back. its an aspect of the divine feminine energy. i was told that less then 4% or .4% of the males on this planet have this ability. it will grow with everyone being able to nurture this aspect of themselves if they choose.

so if you have this ability then the Heavenly Catalyst will help you develop it even more. when you do the meditation you create a sphere of light that you then light your entire being with. you can do it one chakra at a time or body part or whatever you feel is best. their is no right way. their is only a way in which you feel works best for you. the more and more you do this the stronger, compassionate, and more able to radiate, at will, this frequency that changes everything it touches, everything.

Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 90231)
I will never have that innocent view of the world again. Even though it causes pain to everyone that caries this kind of knowledge, I would never trade it in. The path I chose early on in life, has help me be the person I am today and would not change a thing. The trick now, is to figure out why.

yeah i can understand that you want the answer to that question and that will be in due time. you sent the intention out from your soul being and because of the way the universal IS, this answer will come to you. now in the mean time what are you going to do? just my suggestion but do everything you can to develop yourself in all aspects of your life and being and character. you will know when its time to know. the important thing is to keep healing. it will happen.

Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 90231)
I would not call myself a vegetarian. I may go for a couple weeks without eating meat. During this time, the smell of meat is fowl to me and want to gag. Then there are the times when a big juicy steak is all I crave.

thats very interesting. when i first got put into my program i innately went vegetarian. what i feel is that your higher self is already helping you out with this aspect of yourself. the thing is that REMOTE INFLUENCING is very powerful. do you know what R.I. is? look it up. it is very very powerful and many GOV. agencies, black magicians and evil off world entities use this form of control. its so subtle that you may think or even feel that it is you that wants to eat meat. but from my experience its really not your true being that craves eating another beings flesh. ask yourself why when you get really strong urges to do something.

when you eat meat from an animal you take on all the pain and fear that animal has experienced at the time of death. so this energy gets into your field. you become susceptible to these lower vibrations. they can use this against you and they are, against most of the worlds population.

heres the thing. the Gov. and off world evil beings do not like the fact that i am and most spiritual people are vegetarians. you gain abilities when your a vegetarian.

btw
are you by any military bases? or langley?

take care,
elias visvasa

David 01-05-2009 01:37 PM

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David 01-16-2009 03:46 AM

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David 01-16-2009 02:35 PM

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Czymra 01-16-2009 09:30 PM

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Thank you for sharing.

David 01-23-2009 09:26 PM

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David 03-18-2009 03:01 AM

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EpiphaMe 03-18-2009 03:23 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
I'm just a 'nobody person' meaning that I'm not a professional and am mostly self educated. That said, I would offer that you consider that these thoughts/memories may have been planted/downloaded into your mind.

If you've not read Matthew Delooze, I am suggesting that you check out his work. He's another "nobody" sort that had a life changing flood of abduction memories come to mind some yrs back.... And, I'm mindful to mention that he entertains the 'brilliant' (in my view) idea (after his Recall happened as suddenly as yours) that these "memories" were implanted via whatever technology (Swerdlow tells that it's by way of satellite transmission among other techs)... the theory being that ALL humans are mind controlled in a general fashion via the media & learned societal norms.... then there are those that a a bit harder to crack and are specifically targeted, perhaps 5%. It does not mean nor matter that you are "somebody important" or just a 'nobody' sort...

put that together w/pharmaceuticals that are prescribed by conventional medical doctors and placed in our food & water... ok, let me not start a ramble.

Please consider that you have been tampered with. What to do? Look into protection techniques via tones, color & hyperspace geometrics. Try to recognize your true thoughts vs those coming in that are NOT yours...



You are probably NOT crazy...

EpiphaMe 03-18-2009 03:29 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
One last thing... you may be experiencing "psychic attacks"... these continuing apparitions/hallucination/dreams, whatever. There IS (not verified by myself, it's over my head) technology that can produce hallucinations, visual/auditory... I tend to think this is real technology for mind control/programming... triggering events..
so that you either act out or tell others for confusion & alarms to trigger others.

Stay mindful of emotions that are not normal to you... tone up your diet, keep in touch w/a trusted friend or two for feedback.

Hope this is helpful.

David 03-18-2009 04:08 AM

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Wormhole 03-18-2009 06:42 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Hang in there David. Sending you love.
Peace of Mind,
Wormhole

David 04-05-2009 08:46 PM

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Visvasa144 04-05-2009 09:57 PM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 121029)
I can tell you that I have err am being tampered with and as of lately it seems these "events" are to keep me in "check". Keeping in check for what?...who knows. With the Grays I at least comprehended a little as what they were doing with me. The Reptilians however, they refuse to interact with me while I'm conscious and instead force imagery and interrogate with these visions while they do their business.

Crazy? I have questioned myself too many times over the past year over that one. Whenever I see a UFO, no one is around. Whenever I'm taken, everyone is asleep. It's my dark secret that is rarely heard and never mentioned outside of here.

Nobody, I think we all fit into this category. Not interested in fame, glory or money. Don't want it. Just the truth. That little piece of paper that is given to someone for graduating college is no better that anyone else. I commend you for your self education. The world might be a better place if more people took the initiative.

Mind control is a very real possibility.

I have tried all sorts of protections techniques and nothing has worked.


Keeping my health also seems to be on the Reptilians minds. This last time I was told to stay away from red meat. The smell of it is fowl now and if I do eat it, I get severe stomach cramps. Do you know how difficult it is to change your eating habits just like that? I used to love hamburgers and steaks but now I have been learning to live without it. It's hard!!! Interestingly enough, I have lost 10 pounds since it started.

I have one trusted friend and fellow abductee that I talk to. He and I call and email when new things turn up and compare our experiences. It helps both of us and we actually have one particular experience in common.

I honestly, don't know what to think anymore about it. I used to love looking at the stars and staying out all night with the telescope but now...it's the last thing on my mind and is as if a hobby
I loved has been spoiled. That mystery and excitement is gone.

whats up david? hang in there.
sometimes all the protection techniques arent going to make a difference if you have a weakness to what their doing.
if your consciously not able to recognize a threat when in your dream state because of the masking of emotions to make you feel like its a good thing. maybe you can say to yourself just before you go to sleep that, "I will be conscious in my sleep". tweak it for yourself. when the agents started to get into my dreams you have to want to be ready and not only wanting it is enough. it either comes down to being ready and willing or not. you may not totally be able to stop the abduction but if you are aware that you are awake while sleeping then youve just taken a step forward. just keep trying to improve on your abilities. we all have them. you have, right now the abilities to stop certain things they're doing. you just have to bring it out of youself. theirs nothing that is on your plate that you cant deal with no matter how big or scary or unexplainable the situation may be.
its all a test. its all a game. its all to make you aware of what decisions you've made, right or wrong, good or bad in the past.
when your floating and being taken away obviously, something is not correct in your being or they wouldnt be in your space. karma plays out in various ways. past life actions through contracts or stolen soul pieces can allow these goons into your field. the greys and reps. most likely have your pieces and are operating under your own will because...i know this may sound harsh but you have agreed to this in past lives or through hypnosis in the dream state. the reps. are pretty arrogant and tricky. then again so are the grays. then again so are the dark humans on this planet.:wub2:
this is whats going on with me and hopefully you can get some insight about your own situation. over the last couple of months the grays have been in their ships trying to keep implants on me. during soul recovery sessions we go after them. we usually remove the implants and get my soul piece(s) back and who ever else's are karmically tied to them. before we can get the soul piece off their ship the life or lives when the soul piece was taken will appear and play out. after the heavenly catalyst is applied to all involved the soul piece will appear bright and ready to be returned to its rightful owner.
i dont know what it is like to be abducted. i dont want to come off as knowing this or that as fact. all i can share are my experiences and hopefully their is something in them that you can apply with loving kindness.
you know im always up front with you. when youve tried everything that you could possibly try and you havent gone anywhere then what do you do? do you sit their and say well maybe someday this will be fixed. or maybe they will leave me alone someday. or maybe i feel or think its almost over. whatever thoughts and feelings of the future you have put all the future energy into the now. right now.
their is someone that can help you. you just have to find them. i commend you for being strong.

you can become so much stronger then you can imagine.
thats what their scared of. this doesnt exist. that cant be done. who really knows what or what cant be done except you. its really fun finding out what is possible.

sometimes the agents tell me to come back to reality or separate fantasy from fact. i say i cant separate fantasy from fiction. this is my dream.

With this breath I create a sphere of light with Spell and Contract Cancel from all Lifetimes. All Contracts, Vows, Spells and Agreements you may have entered into that is NOT for your Highest Good.

David 04-07-2009 03:12 AM

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Visvasa144 04-07-2009 04:14 AM

Re: Notes from an exsperiencer
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David (Post 126645)
Hi Visvasa144, you are right, they are testing me and it seems every time I figure out one trick, they pull another one on me. It gets really frustrating because I know exactly what is happening to me when I catch them. Then I go blind but still conscious and aware to my surroundings then the imagery is inserted and I zone off into la la land.

I am learning and they keep having to up the ante but one of these days they will run out of cards. I have a trick up my sleeves just as you suggested in your last post and will try it when they come back. Since my last abduction, I have had many thoughts and although harsh, feel as must write them down. Flame me, berate me, it does not matter. I just know I have to say it.
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thats how it goes. the battles will evolve. they find your weaknesses until they are healed. its multi-dimensionally layered.

about your blindness..this happens 100% of the time when the abductions begin?
you dont have to see the targe(s) to hit them. you can still hit these goons with the HC. its your intention. you dont have to see them.
my dog became blind later in his years but he developed very keen senses after that. he could still play catch with a ball as long as i threw it on the ground.
this seems like a great opportunity to improve other senses.

again....

soul piece soul piece soul piece soul piece........find someone to help you get them back. im probably not going to tell you again because these agents want me to stop talking about them but again, soul pieces. get them back.

its time.

pm me.


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