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Old 02-07-2010, 03:34 AM   #1
Mystique
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Is anyone else experiencing a sense of detachment from some friends, lifestyle and old habits? In the past months I've cut the umbilical cord on various friends, eating habits & foods, feeling the need to offer advice to friends with destructive habits, some music, alcohol....etc. My tastes and needs have changed. I enjoy my "alone time" so much more now than ever before. Anybody else out there experiencing this?

What is detachment?
As stated on the LIVESTRONG website:
Detachment is the:
* Ability to allow people, places or things the freedom to be themselves.
* Holding back from the need to rescue, save or fix another person from being sick, dysfunctional or irrational.
* Giving another person "the space" to be herself.
* Disengaging from an over-enmeshed or dependent relationship with people.
* Willingness to accept that you cannot change or control a person, place or thing.
* Developing and maintaining of a safe, emotional distance from someone whom you have previously given a lot of power to affect your emotional outlook on life.
* Establishing of emotional boundaries between you and those people you have become overly enmeshed or dependent with in order that all of you might be able to develop your own sense of autonomy and independence.
* Process by which you are free to feel your own feelings when you see another person falter and fail and not be led by guilt to feel responsible for their failure or faltering.
* Ability to maintain an emotional bond of love, concern and caring without the negative results of rescuing, enabling, fixing or controlling.
* Placing of all things in life into a healthy, rational perspective and recognizing that there is a need to back away from the uncontrollable and unchangeable realities of life.
* Ability to exercise emotional self-protection and prevention so as not to experience greater emotional devastation from having hung on beyond a reasonable and rational point.
* Ability to let people you love and care for accept personal responsibility for their own actions and to practice tough love and not give in when they come to you to bail them out when their actions lead to failure or trouble for them.
* Ability to allow people to be who they "really are" rather than who you "want them to be."
* Ability to avoid being hurt, abused, taken advantage of by people who in the past have been overly dependent or enmeshed with you.

Sincerely, Mystique (Susan)
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Old 02-07-2010, 04:46 AM   #2
dddanieljjjamesss
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I have been noticing a lot, my own behavior and perceptions as well as the way friends behave and perceive. This has allowed me to interject and try to offer solution when I can, but I don't get let down or overly involved if they aren't willing themselves to change. Within the past month I'd say this has been growing.
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Old 02-07-2010, 04:48 AM   #3
Carol
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yup
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Old 02-07-2010, 07:55 AM   #4
greybeard
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Aye.
To a lesser or greater degree all of these are being experienced and are growing spontaneously.
A good thread to start.
Could also be called ," Divine indifference"
There is an awareness that everything is as it is, no action is required and if it is it will occur by itself, ie the "action of non action"
The thought that one can change another, if held as my thought, is just an ego vanity.
To be willing to help is entirely different.
thanks
Chris
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Old 02-07-2010, 08:06 AM   #5
dagon
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yes on all levels. I may come back to this thread. so much is changing and being let go. I find myself wanting to eat nothing processed, and Im in the process of shedding some baggage. as well as personal items. and building new habits as we speak. but im not sure ill ever fit in in this paradigm.

Last edited by dagon; 02-07-2010 at 08:13 AM.
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Old 02-07-2010, 08:35 AM   #6
es7ter
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My sweet Mystique, I am so happy to read your thread, as I was contemplating this during my gardening hours today. I was having a quantum moment as I like to call it, while the rain was falling on me and I had the blessing working the land and giving my intention to the garden. Iíve realized, that as the result of letting go of a lot of feelings, habits and people, that I no longer had a connection with in the last year or soÖ I feel wiser, happier and more balanced. I feel closer to oneness and I am empowered because now I feel and experience that all is well.
I donít want to control anything other than my own thoughts, feelings and actions. I donít feel the need to drink or take any kind of recreational drugs. And I feel at peace within more than ever.
Great thread and thanks for bringing it up, I had it on my mind for some time.
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Old 02-07-2010, 09:14 AM   #7
Phtha
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Your certainly not alone with this Mystique.

Just like the baby to the child to the teen to the adult to elder has its various stages that happen in sequence without exception, so does the spiritual rebirth have the same. Anyone on the spirtual "rebirth" path will come to this stage you are experiencing. These stages or archetypes have been immortalized in the Tarot and in the Alchemical transformation processes, as well as other books such as the bible, but a little more allegorical.

This is a fun video on alchemy that explains these stages from the alchemical perspective... I had to go through quite a few stages myself before I was able to look back and say "hey... that happened to me in this same sequence..."

http://video.google.ca/videoplay?doc...69191085492326
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Old 02-07-2010, 09:17 AM   #8
burgundia
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similar experiences here...
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Old 02-07-2010, 09:41 AM   #9
john-d
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Same here , over the last year i have totally changed . A lot of my old friends think ive gone mad but since reading 'The Ra Material ' ive been totaly concentrating on the posative . Even health wise , ive given up meat , caffeen , sugar , alchahol .... infact everything that is bad for you .
Ive also been trying to open peoples eyes to spirituality , health and what is really going on in the world without forcing it on them and feel elated when some people embrace it .
Very different for someone who's main passion was cagefighting up until a year ago

John
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Old 02-07-2010, 09:42 AM   #10
Greetings
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I'm super detached now . Although i still do have my friends... I am almost always "alone" now. Don't get me wrong i like the change.. but especially coming back from my "6 month spiritual backpack quest" on the other side of the world.. i think at times im a totally different person.

I think its all for the better though. Hey, now i eat the amount of 1 sandwich at most today, and i still do things like bike 14 miles to the library (and back). So i guess thats kinda good
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Old 02-07-2010, 09:43 AM   #11
Greetings
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Quote:
Originally Posted by john-d View Post
Very different for someone who's main passion was cagefighting up until a year ago

John

I love it. Does this go in correspondance to "starseeds" and "lightworkees" and such i wonder??

When i watch cagefighting nowadays i tend to think of star wars/jedis..
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Old 02-07-2010, 10:03 AM   #12
Phoenix
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I call it "The Time Of Seperation"

January was a difficult month energetically kicked off by the eclipse. There has been a very strong and distinct undercurrent of conflict and anger within at the personal level which made no logical sense.

It is all about the individuals shift in conciousness, the seperation from what we thought "was" to what "is"

Its not a bad thing just a little tough, ride the storm, Feb and March will be worth it
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Old 02-08-2010, 01:03 AM   #13
Mystique
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I love Chris' comment, "Divine indifference".... the way it is suppose to be.
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