» Anyone out there who has felt like this in the past and conquered it who can help??
Yes. I've been the black sheep of the family and of the whole society, the weird or crazy guy... like, forever. I am totally at peace with myself now, and even with the chaos around me. I'll try to give some advice. I was too lazy to read the advice of others, so I'm sorry if i repeat something etc. Also, different people, different temperaments, different experience... countless possibilities, which means, not every advice will be suitable for you. Doesn't necessarily mean anyone is more right than others. Just take whatever advice suits you the best at the moment.
In general, what gave me the most, is simply knowledge. The more you understand things, the better you can cope with them. And it's not that much about the illuminati and this conspiracy cr@p - I can very well delve into it because I'm well prepared, but if you just "took the red pill" you have more basic things to worry about. Like finding and balancing yourself. Rather than figuring out banking and political scams you need to figure out what life and universe is about and what your place in it is. When you do that, you'll be well prepared to deal with all the rest.
I imagine it may be difficult for people when they get thrown into all this without a good spiritual background.
I can only give you very small fragments in this short response, so it's more like I'm showing you some guidelines for where to look. Google around and find better explanations for what I'll mention.
Get aquainted with the 4 basic laws of the universe.
- Law of Attraction. Like attracts like. What you do, will come back to you.
- Law of Intent. Things you focus your mind on, will manifest. Your thoughts are much more powerful than this materialist world tells you.
- Law of Allowance. You can't force others. You're only responsible for yourself. You need to "allow" others to follow their path.
- Law of Ballance. Things are supposed to be in balance. If you push for extremes, right or left, you'll have to deal with consequences.
This is very simplified, you'll find webpages that will explain it in detail.
The law of attraction is pretty much what's called karma, it may be useful to learn some basics of buddhism, it should give you a decent explanation of how things work. The eastern traditions usually have a very nice and peaceful way of explaining things.
And again, I recommend to check this beautiful "manual" -
http://www.soulwise.net/et-101.htm
I could point you to many things but it would take you years to go through all that and it kinda looks like we don't have tons of free time right now so... I'll take a few of your quotes and see what comes of it.
» I guess what I am trying to say is that most people have found "happiness" even in this "slavery or control." People have ambitions, hobbies, families and everyday things that make up their lives.
That's natural. You don't really need to get rid of it all right now. Sort through your hobbies and ambitions in the light of the new knowledge and see which of them still seem prosperous and which don't. Many of the things you can probably keep. Those that seem useless, well, throw them away and find new ones. If you feel overwhelmed with it, take it easy, step by step, at a pace that feels comfortable to you.
» When I first came across this kind of information years ago, I told everyone I could and they all looked at me as if I was crazy or even gullible to believe such stories.
Most of us have similar experience. It's ok, that's one of the things we just have to deal with. It's pointless trying to awaken people who want to keep sleeping. If you see some signs of them being open to something new, try to tell them a little and see how they react. If it doesn't go well, you can turn it into a joke with a smile and leave it at that. This is where the law of allowance comes in. You just need to let others find the truth on their own. You can share information if they're open to it, but it's no use trying to "convince" anyone.
» I want to be happy and not worried.
Doesn't everyone? Hehe. But believe me, the difference between being happy or worried is only for ourselves to make. It's not the surroundings that determine it, it's our minds. Spiritually evolved people can be happy no matter how hard life is. Blind and shallow people will complain about everything even if they have all the things they could want. Happiness is not somewhere outside. It's the inner balance. It starts with accepting your fate. Meaning accepting outer conditions that you can not change. If something falls on your head, there's no point complaining about it, wishing it didn't happen, or trying to blame someone for it. It just happened and it won't "unhappen." If you don't focus on the complains, wishes and blame, and instead just say "ok, something fell on my head. so what?" you'll realize that it's actually not such a big deal. Often the anger or frustration you build in your head is 90% of your "suffering" and only 10% is the actual event that caused it. Sometimes when I realize it, I have to laugh at myself for being so stupid.
» I really wish that I can awaken more people.
No point. Don't even focus on that cause it will only bring frustration. [OK, before someone attacks me, in some gentle and reasonable way it's ok, but be aware of the consequences. If people aren't ready for it, it won't work so don't expect much.]
Oh and remember that "awakening people" is what Jehova's Witnesses do. I don't suppose you wanna be like them, do you?
» they all say the same thing "Its just the way it is.we can't change it."
And they are very wrong. But let them say what they want. Truth is, we very well CAN change it. Personally you can only change a small piece, and in the face of millions keeping things the way they are it can feel somewhat desperate, but you don't have much of a choice here. It's either going your own way, in different direction than everyone's pushing you, or back to slavery. It has disadvantages, yes. You'll probably often feel alone. Hell, I've been alone all my life, but I'll rather be alone than herded with the sheep. But you can overcome even that if you set your goals and fix your mind on them.
» I can't even get fellow co-workers to come together and fight for a contract
Hehe, don't even get me started on co-workers. That thing is kind of depressing. I watch them every day, being afraid of the bosses, always complaining but never doing anything to change things. Sometimes I tell them what they can do to change things. I really don't care what they think of me so I try, it's challenge and fun. Well, it pretty much never works cause they always have some excuses, hehe. They lack personal responsibility and have fear. Bad combination. But what can I do, I have to let them do what they want to do. They have a free choice, if they wanna be slaves, well... knock yourselves out.
» deep down inside I know I cannot go back now
That's good, that force will drive you in the right direction.
Some more things...
The law of attraction manifests in the shape of habits. The more you're used to doing one thing, the more it keeps you doing that and the harder it is to change it. In hermetism it is explained on elementals. Let's say you fear spiders. That fear creates an elemental in the astral plane, and that elemental becomes a sort of entity, manifesting your fear of spiders. Every time you get scared of a spider, this elemental grows bigger and stronger. It feeds on the emotion. And as it grows stronger, it also influences you back. It clings to you and sort of whispers to your ear, that you really are very afraid of spiders. So you see it's a vicious circle. To kill the elemental, you need to stop feeding it - with the emotion of fear. If you bring yourself to face spiders, and let the fear go away, the elemental loses its food and starts becoming weaker. In the beginning it's difficult to overcome that fear, but with time, as the elemental grows weaker, it gets easier and easier.
So - it doesn't really matter if my explanation is factually accurate, I think it makes the relations easily understandable. The whole point is, if you want to change, to adapt to something new, you have to stop feeding the old habits and build new ones. Starting with thoughts and emotions. For example the more you keep thinking "maybe I should have taken the blue pill" the more you are feeding the "blue pill elemental" and the less you are feeding the "red pill elemental" thus making the transition into the new experience more difficult. Instead say to yourself "this new experience is what I want and I will live it even if it's difficult." You get the idea, you feed the new experience and the old one slowly dies and lets you move on. Make conscious decisions about what you really want, you can even say it out loud, it disperses doubts and doubts are those elementals that hold you back.
I hope it makes sense to you. It could be explained in many other ways, this was just the easiest way for me to put it in words.
Another thing I would advise you is not to see things as blessings and curses, but as challenges. There are some nice buddhist and taoist stories to describe it, I will just say, don't look at things as good or bad. It's tricky, good things may turn bad and vice versa and then it only makes you confused. Look at things as they just "are," and no matter what, you can make some use of them. Let's take this economical collapse. Most people will tell you it's a bad thing. A few will tell you it's a good thing. I will tell you it just IS. You make of it what you want. It has some downsides but it's bound to have some upsides too, just like everything. It is here, take it as a challenge, adapt to the situation, see where it can take you. It may create opportunities for you, that you otherwise wouldn't have.
Habits and routine can be pretty nasty things. They create a stereotype, make you lazy, make you rely on certain things. Then something breaks the stereotype and you're screwed. Suddenly you're panicking and wondering what to do. If you want to be happy, you shouldn't be clinging to routines and be dependent on some things. Make changes for the fun of it, do the same things in a different way every day, try not doing something you do every day once in a while, try to be without things you feel you depend on sometimes. It will make you more aware of yourself and the world, it will introduce new ideas, it will teach you to deal with more and more things, give you a richer experience.
And one last thing for now, don't take things too seriously, don't take yourself too seriously, keep a sense of humour. Yesterday we talked with my brother about the theoretical possibility of a nuclear explosion somewhere close to us. We really had fun talking about it. And it's not because we think it can't happen. It's just that we don't give it that much importance. Death is just throwing away some flesh. Maybe we're crazy but see if we care.
OK, about time to stop here, so much for my plan to not spend the whole night on the forum, hehe. Next time maybe.
If you find my ideas interesting, I recommend reading Carlos Castaneda's book Journey to Ixtlan. If you like it, read the other ones as well. [Ignore the first 2 books, they're mostly about peyotl and miss the point of the teachings]
Maybe what I said won't resonate with you, it's ok. It's just one of many points of view. Take whatever you like. If it gives you only one useful advice, it was worth it.