Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, not even if i have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.
- Buddha (fridge magnet)
i'm debating at home, my son has one point on me: he's seen too little worth believing from leaders either in his years. anyway, re the game (our survival), if so he says we're all losers
invoked magnet.
0-1
he's the most objected to me on the computer, thinks i'm an idiot (he's young, that's a good opinion at his age, seems), is worried
0-2 for the laugh
but he's wrong
1-1 i let him think he has 2 on nil - this point's really up for grabs
queer music - and i mean
1. differing from the normal or usual in a way that is odd or strange, 2. suspicious, dubious or shady, faint, giddy or queasy, 3. informal homosexual, 5. Informal odd or unbalanced mentality ... 8. to foil or thwart, 9. to put in a difficult or dangerous position
like it's something great being used as an incantation
http://video.google.ca/videosearch?s...1&sa=N&tab=wv#
i'd like to invoke something great, but can't buy into this vision
MORE INFO ABOUT IT
Carmina Burana (pronounced [ˈkarmɪna buˈraːna]), also known as the Burana Codex, is a manuscript collection, found in 1803 in the Bavarian monastery of Benediktbeuern, and now housed in the Bayerische Staatsbibliothek in Munich. The 119 leaves of the original collection contain 228 poems compiled by three different scribes.
ANYWAY, so i wander around pacing, unnerved, wanting to do the RIGHT thing, debate my son
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Still pacing but diffused somewhat. more than doing the RIGHT thing, i really don't want to do the WRONG thing. very worried about missteps, misinterpretations, bold moves with unintended consequences.
wanted to stay focused on the day and called in to work. won't be there again. it's an incubation time. will the cells divide? did they already so i can forget about it? the first 3 months for gestation is always iffy. throughout pregnancy anything can happen. mothers can die! that's what my own mom would always tell everybody when they started rolling dice and making bets about gender. just hope the baby and mother have health! she's very sage in ways of life. death, spirits and whatnot. always making soup, grew up dirt poor. can find food in a ditch. i never met her (she died when i was in utero 8 moonths or so) but my mom's mom was amazingly resourceful. 18 kids. several died. my mom almost did as a little girl. i think she kep the life and coherence for her children. a few may have been borne of wife rape.
anyway, i had a point here. oh, i think i was incubated in grief. nice honest grief. many times it's all i see. it's my own freedom i seek.
i just seem to be connected to everything. nature was a lifeline always. it needs help too now. no longer a resource.
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so, about work. i work in a GPS-y environment. i've taken on a lot of missile defense through it. i'd like to quit and have told my boss so. but it's open-ended, life-draining, instructive.
in that regard, here's a vid. some NEW music. for the new paradigm. eh, brother can you paradigm? (on my wall at work)
for africa now
http://video.google.ca/videosearch?s...1&sa=N&tab=wv#
there's that photo that was circulated by the press a few months ago, the spear thrower waving at the helicopter. it was obscene and disrepectful to do it. i call back.
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speaking of sons, so another one of mine, a zombie expert. darkeaters. i call shotgun. used to gross me out. i thought he was in a spirit compromised. now i value his logic and zombie-hunter skills. he says 'zombies. they catch you, eat you. that's it.'
i'll be glad of him when i sort out who's who at the front door.
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as you can see, i'm toning it down a bit. took in new data today. something seems extremely fragile. am awaiting signs. for what kind of large shots.
the baby bathwater thing
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because argumentative son settled me down, he gets a point for service
0-3
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