I was under the hypnosis of Dr. Brian Weiss at The Omega Institute in July '07 for this recollection.
I looked down at my feet. Black beat up leather shoes standing in dusty gray gravel. I hear the gravel move under my feet as I turn again and wave at the large black train… civil war era steamer shining and new with my mom/youngest son (as a heavyset older young man) and my oldest son (as a younger dark headed young man) hanging out the open window waving back at me. Boys… they are not boys. They are men. My men. Leaving on this giant loud train for war.
They are wearing matching pristine blue civil war Union uniforms. The buttons gleam in the sunlight. I know it is the last time I will see them both together again. My heart breaks. They are both waving and smiling at me. Their father is home working the land. I don’t see him in this life but I know his energy is a “lighter” form of my current husband.
It’s all me and my boys. Going ahead as Brian instructs us, to the next significant event of that life, it is my oldest son (as the dark headed young man) standing disheveled in my creaky wooden door telling me that his brother is dead. He tried to save him. His uniform is tatered. There is a blood stain on it. He looks so dirty and sad.
My mother from this life! My Son. Dead. So far away from me.
Flash forward to my death as instructed. I am dying of pneumonia. Can’t breathe. My oldest is there by my bed as I die. Rattling breath then silence. No pain, Brian says. I cried. Such a cleansing and connected cry.
And as the fat tears started to roll down my face outside the auditorium rain begins to ROAR on the roof of the building we were sitting in. Crazy.
I was a civil war era farmer's wife in the mid-west.
I loved my boys then. And I love them now.
A tight soul cluster is what Dr. Weiss called us.
Do I believe it to be true? No.
I FEEL it is true. I KNOW it.
I don't expect everyone to believe/know.
And that is fine.
All upon different paths back home, ya know?
LOVELOVELOVE