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Let's have some fun with anagrams - you know what they are - you take a bunch of letters, then rearrange them. Like CAT becomes ACT.

So, let's start

DORMITORY = DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN = BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER = MOON STARER

DESPERATION = A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES = THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH = HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE = HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES = CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY = IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS = LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS = ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT = I'M A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES = THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO = TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

MOTHER-IN-LAW = WOMAN HITLER

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Hey, this song just came up on my jukebox and I thought I'd share it with you.
Tom T Hall would have to be one of the best at telling a story. There's a lot of truth in the words of the songs he sings - this old one in particular.

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Okay, I've probably had one of the worse days that I can remember today. Someone cheer me up please!

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In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Brookfield Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, and then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed his stupid ass against the railing, killing him instantly.



Probably wasn't the same elephant.

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Okay...Dantheman finally got enlightened...

http://i9.glitter-graphics.org/pub/3...uylhw9w4uu.gif



So the Pleiadians found out and guess what happened.....

http://www.hermanisnotdead.com/anima...fs/aa_xtnd.gif

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LITTLE GIRL ON A PLANE

A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the
airplane when the stranger turned to her and said,
'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you
strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed
it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you
like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger.. 'How about
nuclear power?' and he smiles.

OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic.
But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow,
and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass - .. Yet a
deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a
flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried
grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's
intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have
no idea.....'

To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel
qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know
Sh..t?

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[QUOTE=Dantheman62;152288]In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Brookfield Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, and then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed his stupid ass against the railing, killing him instantly.



That was Funny!! :lmao:

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Is that better????

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One more!


For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to
ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money
if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in
Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the
child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby
was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and
write 'Spaghetti' on the back. He would then arrange for the child
support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
'Honey,' she said, 'You received a very strange post card today.'

'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later,' he said. The wife obeyed
and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written: 'Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three with meatballs, two without. Send extra sauce.''

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Thanks guys, sorry my computer is not feeling well tonight either! Yes it worked!:thumb_yello:

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One of my favorites!

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That's one of my favorites too, just ask BROOK......:naughty::mfr_lol:

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I liked the bird with the contrails :lmfao:

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Hey you found a picture of me, one of the cat that hangs out in my yard and I'm not sure about that bird, maybe someone fed him some baked beans.:lmao::lmao:

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This pic is a real crack up

http://www.debbieschlussel.com/archives/Laughing.jpg

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All we need now is.....some more COWBELL

YouTube - Acri SNL cowbell
I gotta fever..and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL

http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f1.../cowbell-2.gif

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Why does that guy look like Big Foot?????:naughty: Someone buy him a razor!

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I was watching it there too!:original:

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Love that Robin Williams vid, what a professional. :lmao:

I had another great day-off at the beach (whole beach to myself again)
While I was reading a giant sea eagle flew over me and sat high in a tree overlooking the sea, I'm glad he made me put my book down for a second cause I looked down and there were dolphins playing only a few meters in front of where I was! Ive never seen wild dolphins so close to land in this part of Australia before so was really nice.

Saw some wallabies & kangaroos on the way home too. :thumb_yello:

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If a white person holds their breath too long they turn blue - could it be that black people turn green?

Just a thought.

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Don't forget to rock'n'roll.